These enemies they have to come back in order to make up for the last life. But they’re too low, and they make a lot of trouble as well. But if I refuse them, they become worse even. They cannot go up. […] The thing is, it was my fault, though. Before I even took on this business officially, I vowed that I would save the people who are the worst cases, who are from hell and who nobody else cares for. So, they all come to me. So it’s my fault. But OK, I can bear it. It’s not a big deal. It’s just that you cannot say that you don’t feel anything. […]
And my own people forced me to give money. So, I gave him the knife, I said, “Here, I don’t have it. You take the knife, and you do what you want with me.” (Oh, my God!) And then he just somehow stopped. […] Can you believe that? Supposed to be my driver. (Oh, my God!) And he said he didn’t want to drive me anymore. Give him the money now, he wanted to go, and give him the car as well. I said, “No, I can’t.” (Oh, my God!) “The car I need. That type of money I don’t have.” And later, I gave him some for his parents. I said, “This is for your parents.” He said, “Then I have nothing? That’s all You have? Ten thousand only?” My God, 10,000 (euros), he talked like it’s a piece of cake. People work outside very hard, cannot save 10,000 (euros) in a year. Right? (Yes.) He said, “Why? Why couldn’t I have more?” I said, “Because you’re not worth it. Even if I have, I won’t give it to you.” So, he knew that I was not scared, and I would not do it. […]
So, I just found a resident to drive me away, fast, somewhere else. And I sent another resident to pick him up, to tell him that I was in an urgent situation, I had to leave, I could not take him, I could not wait for him. “I’m sorry, the car, I need.” So, I sent a resident to pick him up and send him back to where he wanted. And when he got there, he still wanted the car. The resident didn’t give it to him. He said, “Oh, we need it to go fetch people from the airport and bring them back and forth, and all that.”
Imagine! So, Judas’ story didn’t happen only in Jesus’ time. (But is it the dark force working through them?) Of course! (Or they don’t realize what they’re doing?) They do realize what they’re doing. (They do realize what they’re doing but the dark force just uses them. Oh, my God.) Also, bad instruments. (It’s scary. Yes, yes.) Bad instruments – everywhere. (Wow!)
Even now, every day, I have a headache with even just one female assistant. She makes trouble all the time. (I’m sorry. Who can You trust?) Like she doesn’t lock my door when she comes in and she goes out; she just leaves it all open. And I’m not there; I’m not even aware of that. You know, suppose somebody comes in there and waits for me again, in the house, because the house is not locked – for example, like that. Or the dog(-person)… When she goes out at lunchtime, she doesn’t take off his vest. And when coming in the house with the cold air con, then she doesn’t put the vest on either. You see what I mean? (Right.) In the hot, she keeps the vest on. In the cold, she takes it off. And she knows it’s not right; we told her many times already. This is common sense, no? Every day, she finds something. I’m so scared of her, but I don’t have people.
All the good residents have to go out for initiations, give initiation, manage (vegan) restaurants, even do a waiter’s job, cook for everybody in the restaurant, or do a lot of office work – all kinds of things. And managing other places or doing [all] kinds of things. So, I don’t really have anybody. And besides, whoever comes, in just a few weeks they just change or make it different or make trouble because their level’s too low. The negative can scratch them now and then. (Yes.) But the woman I have this time is every day trouble. I don’t mean to complain. Even if I do, I... (No. It’s good to hear because I think it comes up because of these things, but now You’re making me feel my suffering is nothing, really.) It’s good for you, at least. (But I’m sorry for You. I’m really sorry for You.) It’s OK. Don’t worry. (My heart bleeds. It’s like hearing it, it’s so...) It’s OK.
(Who can You trust, Master?) I’m used to it. I told you. I can’t. (You can’t.) I really wanted to trust somebody. And once I planned to trust this guy, because he was new, he looked nice, but suddenly he changed. All the things I had not known about him before suddenly came out. When I plan in my mind, “Now, OK, I’m going to use this guy because he’s still young, and I can trust him with many things. In case I die suddenly, there are this and that and others.” But then suddenly, I realize that I cannot trust – just like (that) all the time. So, I’m just stuck with whoever I have, for the dog(-people)’s sake. At least somebody takes care of the dog(-people).
Because if I change and somebody else takes care, I’m not sure if it’s the same, because I keep changing and nothing better happens. But as long as the dog(-people) are well, I accept the suffering just for that. Because, like I’m here at different times. When I come home, I can’t even cook for myself. How would I take care of the dog(-people), you know? I’m tired sometimes. And also, like at different times. Sometimes, I tell somebody to buy food and put it in the fridge over there for me, but I don’t have time to cook, and it becomes rotten. And over here, sometimes I don’t have time to eat, and [it] also becomes rotten.
During the retreat, it’s a little bit more difficult like that, so I just have to bear it. During the retreat, the negative force works even more on the assistant. (I can imagine.) Every single day, she makes me suffer! (Oh my God.) Every single day, she makes me remember that she’s on the planet and she has power over me because of my dog(-people). Every single day! (Wow! Oh my God.) Sometimes, I’m lucky – just one time per day. Sometimes not lucky – more than one time per day. And I just have to bear it all. What am I to do? Oh, it’s terrible!
Every time retreat, or I’m busy or go on tour, oh, these are coming strong. All things together, all sides, that I don’t even know where to… If you watch a kung fu [film] (Yes.) or sometimes action movies, you see how the guy has to sometimes deal with different attacks from different sides? (Yes.) Physically, emotionally, and mentally. Or the wife just left, and everything else… Or the housekeeper just quit, or the kids run away – all kinds of things like that happen at once to the main character. It’s like that. It’s chaos all the time. (Oh, wow.) But I’m used to it. I’m used to it. What to do?
(Why is it worse during retreats? Is it because we’re all here?) Yeah, yeah! Of course, more karma. (Yes, sure.) All of you take some part of the luck from me. Don’t you realize that? (Yes. Yes.) Because most of you don’t have enough luck. So, if you’re around, of course, you take a part of the luck – maybe 0.5, 0.02, or maybe 1%, maybe 2%. The assistants they also take luck from me. So, the more assistants, the less luck I have. And, of course, the more disciples, the more I lose. But what to do? So, therefore, normally, I would have less problems with the assistant because my luck and my control power are still strong. But if more people are around, then I’m weakened, because I have to give some to you. And, of course, in that situation, they attack me easier, and it’s stronger.
(Master, would that happen with either of us if we were so close to You? Like…) Happen with what? What happens? (No, because it’s like…) (Changed it.) (…because it’s so close to You that it weakens us, say if we…) Because you’re close to me, it weakens you? (Yes, because it sounds like…) No, you’re always already weak, that’s why. (But if we… if we, say, are in the position of assisting You, then if we hear from Your… it seems to be like it’s impossible, right? I mean, that…) It depends. (If I’m probably close, then I’m weaker.) Maybe. No, not weaker; you’re already weak. When you are alone, you cannot do anything to me. But when you’re with me, then you can. You see what I mean?
(What if I don’t want that? Then still the power somehow affects it?) Yeah, if your level is not too high, if your faith is not too strong, if you have too much human emotion instead of seeing the real thing. It is just like that guy. I told him to close the bathroom window because the police were outside or something outside. The police sometimes connect with bad people. It’s not like all the police are bad, but some of them could be. Well, I watch it all the time in documentary films and all that about police. Sometimes, they are forced to work with drug people or something. They are forced to, for some reason. Or maybe they need money or something like that. Or maybe easy money – [for] many different reasons. So, what is it? You want to work for me now? Why do you worry so much? You’re not with me; why do you worry? (I don’t know. It sounds so incredible.) (It sounds so incredible.) Yes, I know.
But the thing is, many of the people who work next to me, they are previous enemies. They’ve been my robbers in former lives, my thieves, or my molesters – all kinds of things or wanted to molest – so whenever I’m near this kind of person, oh, my God! It’s not just the suffering; it’s sometimes you feel sexually molested – astrally, not physically. And this is very ugly, I’m telling you! Sometimes, I cannot bear it! I have to go and turn on the TV, watch any stupid cartoon or whatever in order to forget this. Because… I even have one now. And every time I see her, I feel – whoa, God, oh, God, oh, God! If you could feel the filthy energy, you’d understand what I’m saying. I’m glad that you don’t feel, because the more sensitive you are, the more you can feel these things. And because I’m constantly on retreat myself, my energy’s very vulnerable to good and bad. And then, these kinds of things, you can feel; it’s just like black and white.
Normally, maybe before this retreating time now, before these years or last year, maybe I felt it less, more bearable. But now I feel, “Oh, my…” Because in a former life, this type of person wanted to molest me. (And they come and find You again and…) Yeah, yeah! That’s what they come for. That’s what the maya sends them for, but I cannot refuse them. (Wow.) I have to save them, too. But in order to do that, I suffer a lot, physically, emotionally, and… This is a very, very incredible situation. I know. So, just don’t come near me, then. If you’re so scared, don’t come nearby. It depends, also. But it’s funny that it’s difficult to find a good person. These enemies they have to come back in order to make up for the last life. But they’re too low, and they make a lot of trouble as well. But if I refuse them, they become worse even. They cannot go up. Whoa! My God.
(Master, the [vegan] ice cream was delicious.) (Vegan) ice cream? You have more in the storeroom. (Thank You, Master.) Is the price reasonable there? I never go there. I never know what they sell. I just told her today that I am going to check the price, whether they sell it too expensive or anything, or they just cover the cost. Normally, they should just cover the cost. I have never known the shop. I didn’t know they have a shop there even. I just know it recently, only on this retreat. Recently. (Oh.) And I always wanted to ask them about the price, but I never had the time to do it. Because at this time, I normally have to run fast. Today, I came early; I have a lot of time. But mostly, I run fast. I come quick, and then I go quick.
The thing is, it was my fault, though. Before I even took on this business officially, I vowed that I would save the people who are the worst cases, who are from hell and who nobody else cares for. So, they all come to me. So it’s my fault. But OK, I can bear it. It’s not a big deal. It’s just that you cannot say that you don’t feel anything. That’s all. I’m explaining all this to you maybe so that you know something. Maybe you can also protect yourself.
Photo Caption: Greetings With Open Heart.
